Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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