mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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