Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
