Your tits are I can't wait for
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
