Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(972): View more from Texas

i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?

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(702): View more from Nevada

So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?

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(317): View more from Indiana

I got her a Nickelback box set.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

birth control should be required to get into college

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(773): View more from Illinois

You're such a slut.

(318): View more from Louisiana

I prefer opportunist.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.

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(719): View more from Colorado

He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."

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(706): View more from Georgia

I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4

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