Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
