Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize