Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.