Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
