escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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