Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize