we're chasing vodka with high fives
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Randomize
