everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
