so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I look excited, but its just a facade.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
