The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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