Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize