he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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