stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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