My nipple is on Facebook.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
