genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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