I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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