sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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