If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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