I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize