dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Randomize
