and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
