the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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