hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
