Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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