i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
