what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
No...this little piggys going to the bar
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize