Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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