Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Randomize
