At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
