Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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