This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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