1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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