singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize