Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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