I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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