the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
