he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
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Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
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Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black