It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
