We won't sleep together?
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
