I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
