Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
