The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
