Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
