you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
