dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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