Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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