it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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