; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
you never un-have a 4some
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
